In the early spring of 1980 I began what was one of the biggest blessings on my life. I started a career one could only dream of - I became a teacher. I was hired to be part of the Marketing Department faculty at Des Moines Area Community College.
What I didn’t realize I was becoming part of a team that’s goal was to help others succeed. My first few months was a whirlwind of activities. To prepare for class each day I would spend the night before reading and preparing lesson plans. My joke was my first year of teaching was staying a chapter ahead of the students. I’d learned in education classes the value of “Lesson Plans” a road map for each day’s class. It meant you knew where each class would begin and end.
As part of my spring I had several meetings with the department chairperson. That was another blessing. The chairperson was instrumental in my hiring and major part of my life's teaching style. Jerry Manning was also my homeroom teacher in high school and coordinator of my internship as part of my degree so his influence was many years in the making.
I hadn’t seen Jerry since graduating high school but saw his name on a list of classes being offered at DMACC when I returned to college after my military service. It was there his influence on my adult life began. He guided me to my adult career. Another blessing.
During one of our meetings Jerry asked me to watch a video by Dr Leo Buscaglia entitled “The Art of Being Human.” The video introduced me to what would become a distant mentor. Jerry was my local mentor and Dr Leo Buscaglia was my distant mentor.
Over the years I read many of the books written by Buscaglia and watched many videos. Out of this time I think I became the person I am today. The thoughts and concepts shared in the books and videos also set my teaching style.
I found that teaching was more listening than talking. More sharing than telling. More we and less me. I found by listening and sharing I often learned more than I taught. As a result I looked at my structural lesson plans as a road map but not a point of beginning and ending. I quit teaching subjects and started teaching students. If the lecture was interrupted by a question or a discussion we listened and shared. From that time I realized the importance of these characteristics I’m not sure I ever covered every chapter of every book for each class again but I also learned students can be trusted to learn on their own.
Buscaglia spoke on learning to love, to share, to care for others and emphasized you can’t give what you don’t have which meant you had to learn to love yourself and accept yourself as you are before you could ever help others learn their value.
I was again blessed many years after I let Buscaglia influence my life, I had a chance to meet and have dinner with my distant mentor. It was a beautiful experience. I must admit it also was a time of mental conflict as well. I feared I had built this person up to a point reality would kill the image. He said that when he first met someone his Italian heritage led him to hug the person. He called himself a toucher (before it wasn’t politically correct). Being of Italian heritage I too hugged those that I was/am happy for and care about.
Upon arriving at his LA condo I was nervous and when we were greeted at the door and were introduced Buscaglia gave me a hug - the rest of the evening went off without a hitch. I think he was surprised someone from Iowa knew so much of his writings and was taken back that he was my absentee mentor. We shared stories throughout the evening.
From reading his books and watching his videos I had a series of thoughts and quotes I’d share with other from the classroom to life.
As you know a year ago my dad passed away and a former student sent me a quote from one of Buscaglia’s books that I used in a class and it meant so much. It was the right thing to receive at the exact right time. The words were so impactful and so soothing at a time of sorrow. I decided at that moment that I too would share the quote with those in my life that were experiencing a loss - unfortunately I’ve used it too often this year. I’d like to share it with you in hopes you too can find resolve in a loss or share it with those you know that may find it beneficial….
“I know for certain that we never lose the people we love, even to death. They continue to participate in every act, thought and decision we make. Their love leaves an indelible imprint in our heart’s memories. We find comfort in knowing that our lives have been enriched by having shared their love.” Leo Buscaglia
10.12.2020
The video that was my introduction to Dr Buscaglia is available on YouTube. You’ll need to struggle through 1979 video quality but the message is as important now as it was then.
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